Clinton Montague

An email to Ocean Spray

April 12, 2010

Dear Sir,

After watching your advert on TV about how easy it was to drink Ocean Spray with gloves on, I decided that on my recent Arctic exploring trip, I would leave behind my usual Darjeeling and instead take your juice instead.

Upon arriving at the Arctic Circle, me and my chums decided it would be a prudent time to have a jolly nice sit down and enjoy some dry yet refreshing fruit juice. That’s when we were struck by total disaster. A nasty twist of fate. We were unable to open the juice with our gloves on. Oh, what we would have done for a nice warm pot full of a well brewed, full on Morning Breakfast. We were so parched that we would have even settled for Tetleys, but alas, it was not to be so.

After hours stuck in the Arctic Tundra with no accessible liquid, my dear friend, Sir T. Cup of Yorkshire, was getting desperate. He took off his glove and opened the juice. By the beard of Zeus, it was delicious, but was the refreshing taste worth the hand of a good man?

Yours sincerely,

Lord Clinton Montague.

(Oh, ok, I’m not really a Lord, have a friend who lost a hand or explore the Arctic. But it IS difficult to open the juice with gloves on!)

Update! They replied!